Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Food Rehab?
This past Monday marks the 1,008,876th Monday that I have decided to eat right and exercise. Diet and exercise has been a struggle for me for the past few years. I would start a program, then quickly fall off the path. I want so bad for this to come easy to me, I just feel like I have no will power when it comes to junk food. And Red Bull. And Dr. Pepper. Its not that I'm in danger of any health problems, but I am overweight and I think it overtakes my self-esteem more than anything. If anyone remembers me from when I was younger, this was never an issue for me. People even thought I was anorexic, but I ate all the time, whenever and whatever I wanted. And thats how it was for 23 years. What I struggle with the most it getting out of that mindset that I can still eat like that. I was having a conversation with a group of people recently about addictions and it really hit home for me. Food can be an addiction, and that behavior is self-indulgent. Where is the food addiction rehab? I guess its one of those things that you have to figure out for yourself, unless you have a lot of time and money. So for now, I'm making a go at it and I feel different about it this time. It seems do-able. And when I'm in my weak moments, I'll remember what Melina told me the other night when I told her I was going to exercise, "Mommy, how come you don't exercise ALL the time?" Bless her heart, she is a great motivator:)
Friday, March 26, 2010
Better Late Than Never...
I have always wanted to keep a blog of our family, but just never got around to it. I really wish that I would have started it a long time ago, but better late than never, right? Jason and the kids are constantly giving me memories to document, so hopefully I can keep up with them!
It is still freaking me out that Melina is already 5. Thats 5 years old. Like half a decade. How can she be that old when I can remember the day she was born like it was yesterday? I have to say that Jason and I have done a great job raising her so far. She is exactly what I pictured when I found out I was going to have her, only way better. I had a list of guidelines in my head of how I wanted her to be: polite, sweet, not a spoiled brat, etc. Of course she has her moments, but she has way exceeded those hopes that I had for her. I'm so thankful that God has blessed us with her. She will be starting Kindergarten this August. I have mixed feelings on the subject, which I really don't like to talk about. I am excited for her to go to the "big school" , make new friends, I'm even excited to make her lunch everyday. But the thought of watching her walk into that huge place by herself and leave her there makes my stomach turn. I know, I know. She's a big girl and she will be able to handle it, but I know I'm not ready. I'm sure that they will take good care of her and she will learn a lot, but it is a little intimidating to me. She has been in daycare since she was 18 months old and I LOVE it there. Its not a huge daycare where she gets neglected at all, I know she gets a lot of attention which I love. But there is not a day that goes by that I don't turn around and watch her as I leave and wish that I could stay there with her and play. I still have a tough time leaving her, and I'm sure this will never change. Maybe I'm just afraid of change. At least she has a cute My Little Pony backpack :)
Just like I freak out when I think about Melina being 5, I freak out that Carmen is 10(almost 11)! She was Melina's age when I met her and Jason, which totally blows my mind! Melina loves when Carmen comes to the house and cries every time she leaves! I'm so thankful that they get along(most of the time). She has grown up so much, it seems like we just blinked and both of them aged 5 years.
It is still freaking me out that Melina is already 5. Thats 5 years old. Like half a decade. How can she be that old when I can remember the day she was born like it was yesterday? I have to say that Jason and I have done a great job raising her so far. She is exactly what I pictured when I found out I was going to have her, only way better. I had a list of guidelines in my head of how I wanted her to be: polite, sweet, not a spoiled brat, etc. Of course she has her moments, but she has way exceeded those hopes that I had for her. I'm so thankful that God has blessed us with her. She will be starting Kindergarten this August. I have mixed feelings on the subject, which I really don't like to talk about. I am excited for her to go to the "big school" , make new friends, I'm even excited to make her lunch everyday. But the thought of watching her walk into that huge place by herself and leave her there makes my stomach turn. I know, I know. She's a big girl and she will be able to handle it, but I know I'm not ready. I'm sure that they will take good care of her and she will learn a lot, but it is a little intimidating to me. She has been in daycare since she was 18 months old and I LOVE it there. Its not a huge daycare where she gets neglected at all, I know she gets a lot of attention which I love. But there is not a day that goes by that I don't turn around and watch her as I leave and wish that I could stay there with her and play. I still have a tough time leaving her, and I'm sure this will never change. Maybe I'm just afraid of change. At least she has a cute My Little Pony backpack :)
Just like I freak out when I think about Melina being 5, I freak out that Carmen is 10(almost 11)! She was Melina's age when I met her and Jason, which totally blows my mind! Melina loves when Carmen comes to the house and cries every time she leaves! I'm so thankful that they get along(most of the time). She has grown up so much, it seems like we just blinked and both of them aged 5 years.
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